At seminary, the professor of Old Testament often noted that most people have some sort of myth that they live by – it becomes the narrative of their life. “If you don’t like your myth,” she’d say, “then change it!”

She’s right, of course. Most of us do have an idea about what our story is, and of course we’re the hero of the story.

When I was a little girl, I took gymnastics down at the Polish Falcons in Braddock, Pa. Since this was the '70s, around the same time cartoons featuring woman superheroes were being rolled out. I grew up with Electra Woman and Dyna Girl, Wonder Woman and, of course, Super Girl. I loved these shows so much that my mom took one of my gymnastics leotards, sewed a giant red S on it, and made me a cape. I’d swing on ropes, jump out of trees and save the world. It was great fun.

Throughout life, I think this has been my myth. My family life wasn’t always pleasant, and more than once, young and small as I was, I’d stand up to my 6-foot-4 stepdad when, drunk, he’d make our lives hell. He was a bully, and like most bullies, couldn’t stand up to someone who wouldn’t back down. Either that, or not even he would hit a girl who was barely 5 feet tall.

He was the monster, I was the hero who won the day.

And now, older, I find that’s no longer my story. First, as the Ani DiFranco song says, I’m not angry anymore. And second, I’m not half as strong. I feel weak, beaten down by MS. Don’t get the wrong idea. I have a good life. I feel fine, I’m not depressed, I’m just stating the obvious. I am weak, I will not ever be physically strong again. And MS … you can’t really fight it. All you can do is learn how to live with it.

So I need a new myth.

As a writer, I know stories and blog entries are to have clear-cut beginnings, middles and ends. But this entry has no ending yet. This is something new I’m trying out. It’s time to reinvent myself, or perhaps, to discover who I am at this point in my life. To just relax and let the world save its own self.

In other words, it’s time to hang up the cape. Just not sure what the new outfit should be yet …

Has anyone seen Ronda Barker in San Diego? If so email me at janeblakemoore@msn.com She was from Delta, Colorado she came to SD a few years ago after meeting folks on this board. Thanks!! Jane

There was once a person with MS who wrote a story/blog that said it was time for a new myth. She then decided to forgive her step-dad and not ever mention him again. This was hard to do, but not as hard as the MS she dealt with every day. Sometimes a great deal can be accomplished by not doing anything at all.