When a good personal care attendant leaves me, I’m heartbroken. The departure of this person who I have come to trust and who knows me in a very intimate way leaves a hole in my stomach. It’s a special relationship because this person often becomes a friend and sometimes even family. I understand it’s probably not personal that they must move on — they need more money, are starting a family, have been accepted to university, or some other valid reason. Nonetheless, I feel a little rejected. I grieve and feel sorry for myself, and then I resent that others don’t have the same constant worry. How will I get into bed at night? Shower? Get into my wheelchair in the morning?